(07) 5569 0115 - Gold Coast
How to harness your feminine power

When we think of power and success, the first image that comes to mind tends to be that of a well-dressed man in a suit, perhaps commanding a board room or taking calls in his corner office. Many women have spent their lives feeling as though they need to better express their masculine selves in order to be successful and feel powerful – and to compete with the men in these images. Tapping into your masculine energy may seem like a way to succeed in a ‘man’s world’, however, it can eventually become overwhelmingly negative influence on our minds, bodies and souls. The true way to harness your power? To embrace your femininity.

Any woman will attest that to succeed in schooling, in a career, and in the rest of our lives, we feel as though we must work harder than any man, just to prove we are able. From experiencing the pressure to do better at school, to being strong and uncompromising in our interactions at work, or to negotiating hard on that new property sale; we feel as though we need to pack away those aspects of ourselves that make us feminine, and highlight our tough, powerful, confident exteriors instead. And sure, being confident and strong are not things to be afraid of. In fact, they’re important characteristics for any woman to have. The trouble is, our examples of strong and powerful characteristics are often overtly masculine in their nature.

So, what’s so wrong with being masculine? Nothing at all, if that is something that comes naturally to you. However, if displaying a masculine energy or attitude is something that’s not a part of our true identity, it can cost us so much more than we are likely to gain from it. Much like putting on a heavy suit of armour each day, or painting on the war paint each morning in order to feel ready to face the world, it costs energy to maintain that façade. Holding back our true feelings to instead put forward a strong and uncompromising exterior is hard work. This pressure we put on ourselves can manifest itself into stress and anxiety and even health issues if not addressed.

Let’s be honest, you and many women you know probably associate feminine energy with compassion at best, and passivity, weakness and emotional vulnerability at worst. Hardly aspects of your personality that you’d expect to deliver you success and power. Fortunately, nothing could be further from the truth. Learning to embrace all that it means to be a woman can unleash a powder keg within you and allow you to let go of the armour you’ve been wearing for years.

There is power in allowing yourself to express yourself as a woman, without maintaining a façade of masculinity, or by being dominated by your masculine energy. Allowing yourself to embrace this can change your life in ways you’d never imagined. Below are five surprising examples of how to find power by being true to yourself as a woman.

Whether we’re talking career or life goals, being results orientated is something we’ve all been taught to embrace. In fact, being goal-centric at any cost is one way in which women tend to overcompensate with masculine energy. After all, if we aren’t speeding towards our end-goal, we’re likely to be overtaken by those who are, right? Wrong. Learning to have a plan in mind but slowing down to enjoy the journey and appreciate the process can be incredibly rewarding. This more relaxed attitude allows us to ‘stop and smell the roses’ and makes the journey so much more enjoyable.

Many of us have a habit of allowing the masculine people in our lives (that doesn’t just mean the men, by the way) dictate what we do and how we do it. This might mean letting our date choose the location for dinner, to compromising on the area we want to live in when buying a house with our partners. We want to be compassionate and compromising in certain situations because we’re concerned with taking care of everyone around us and not rocking the boat. One way to embrace our femininity without overcompensating with masculinity is to express our expectations and desires clearly (I’d like to go out for Italian tonight) but allow others to follow through with the actions (let someone else do the planning). Not being a pushover doesn’t mean being demanding or controlling, and it doesn’t mean having to do all the work yourself. It simply means striking a healthy balance.

Sure, when you’re on the debating team at school, winning with a strongly-worded and well-thought-out argument is a great strategy. It’s not so useful throughout the rest of our lives, however. The power in being a woman lies with being able to embrace our compassion and empathy to take people on a journey with us through storytelling. Feminine power is about relating to people on a human level, and not simply constructing a water-tight argument. Learning to embrace this different approach to persuasion can unleash a world of possibility.

It’s true that first impressions last, and we often feel the need to make an impact upon meeting someone – be it a new colleague, our child’s teacher at school, or even when meeting new people in social situations – by being perceived as confident and powerful. Being outwardly confident can be a strategy we use to make a good impression on people, however what many of us fail to realise is that people are unlikely to remember what you said or did, but how you made them feel. Embracing what makes you a woman and taking into account your innate ability to connect with people means being remembered for how you make others feel about themselves rather than showing off how you feel about yourself. Walk into a room and connect with people and you’ll leave a much more positive lasting impression.

As women, we are taught from a young age to compete with each other. This leads to a habit – whether conscious or unconscious – of tearing each other down rather than building other women up. Women might still be a minority in the board room, but we account for as much as 51% of the world’s population, and there’s power in numbers. By learning to embrace the other women in our lives and put real energy into building each other up, we can become unstoppable.

At Integrated Health Specialists, we help to teach our clients about the ‘Yin & Yang’ or feminine and masculine energies within them. Finding a balance between these two energies plays a big role in our fulfilment in life. Being out of balance with these energies, as many women tend to become, means that some work on realigning this balance is necessary. In our psychology and life coaching programs we teach:

“One key to a successful and fulfilling life is balancing your masculine and feminine energies. If you take a look at your typical day, you’ll probably notice there are times when you’re very action oriented. At other times, you’ll notice you’re not really doing much of anything, but instead, just simply being. These two activities – doing and being – are the physical expression of the masculine and feminine energies. These terms have nothing to do with gender, and everyone, whether you’re male or female, is composed of both energies.”

We’ve helped many women to find their power and embrace both the feminine and masculine energy within themselves, to lead a more fulfilled and balanced life. To find out more about balancing your Yin & Yang, and embracing your power as a woman, connect with us today.

Michelle van Namen
Author: Michelle van Namen