Gold Coast Low Self-Esteem Counselling Services
Low Self-Esteem Counselling can help you to overcome your issues with low self-esteem and low self-worth.
Have you struggled with low self-esteem or low self-worth?
Do you fear rejection, and worry about what others think of you?
Do you experience feelings of personal failure, and a lack of confidence in your abilities?
There are many reasons for low self-esteem and low self-worth, and they are often deeply-rooted issues which develop from childhood. Unfortunately many people suffer in silence, and this can greatly affect your ability to get on with day-to-day life, and prevent you from reaching your full potential.
We’re all guilty of self-criticism, and it’s quite normal to pick out your flaws or weaknesses. In fact, these behaviours are essential for personal growth and development. It’s when these self-deprecating habits become excessive that there becomes a cause for concern, as this may lead to a decline in self-esteem and sense of self-worth. Self-worth describes what one thinks of themselves, and how you regard yourself in relation to others. The beliefs you have formed about yourself are only the opinions that you have formed by the experiences you have had in your life to date, and your conclusions you have formed from these experiences, that can lead to how you feel about yourself. If you have had many negative experiences, the beliefs you have about yourself are likely to be more negative too. This is where low-self esteem counselling can really help!
Low self-esteem counselling can help someone deal with their specific circumstances, by having a professional talk to them about their difficulties, their perceptions and interpretations of their experiences, and their related insecurities. From there, an effective counsellor can help to facilitate a client to work through their problems in a more constructive way.
Usually formed during childhood, a person’s self-esteem is delicate, and even the smallest negative experience can affect a child’s sense of self-worth up to and throughout adulthood. Everyone is different – a lot of people can easily brush nasty comments off their shoulders. However, many people take on those negative comments or experiences, internalise them, and start to believe them. This kind of behaviour can be the gateway to a slippery slope into anxiety and depression. This can lead us to making unhelpful choices and decisions, such as not applying for a job we are qualified to do, or staying in a destructive relationship.
Low self-esteem signs
Negative self-talk, self-doubt and insecurity are some indications of low self-esteem, and typically occur when a person constantly compares themselves to others, and from this comparison believes they aren’t good enough or don’t match-up.
Some typical examples include perhaps feeling like a failure for not going to the gym one day, or feeling out of place and unable to contribute in social situations, or shy behaviour born out of the fear of being ridiculed, or feeling unaccomplished. These destructive beliefs can become concreted in the sufferer’s’ mind due to how little they think of themselves, even though there may be no evidence of them actually being true.
Some signs and symptoms of low self-esteem include:
- Being overly self-critical; verbally and silently.
- Feeling anxious or depressed around others.
- Often focusing on negatives and ignoring any positives in your life, or turning positives in your life into negatives.
- Being unable to accept any positive comments or compliments. Instead brushing them away and trying to change the subject immediately, or thinking the person is only giving the compliment to make you feel better.
- Perfectionism – holding unrealistic expectations of yourself and never being able to live up to them.
- Holding others in higher regard than you hold yourself, thinking you can never compare to them.
- Extreme sensitivity to any criticism, form of rejection or disapproval.
- Constant self-doubt about your abilities.
There are several ways in which low self-esteem can affect people, and signs can show up in different ways. However, in general it begins with the sufferer placing an enormous amount of pressure on themselves to live up to their unrealistic expectations.
Pivotal moments in life may be missed out on, because of low self-esteem! It can cause feelings of social isolation and reclusiveness due to insecurity and shame. It may also result in an extrovert becoming an introvert, a person not taking up opportunities due to feeling incapable of success, or a sufferer rejecting people’s help due to feelings of unworthiness.
Benefits of low self-esteem counselling
Low self-esteem is essentially the result of dysfunctional thinking patterns, which can be a difficult and complicated thing to deal with on your own. Additionally, sometimes a person can become so closed-off from rational, realistic thinking that they begin believing their behaviours are normal.
By talking to a counsellor, a person can then hear themselves out loud, which in itself can begin to alter their thinking pattern. The counsellor can then offer an objective, professional opinion and advice which is unclouded by negative or heightened emotions.
During counselling you will learn useful techniques such as challenging negative thoughts and beliefs, working on your strengths and setting realistic goals, all under the guidance of an experienced counsellor.
Low self-esteem can be the culminated result of many things from environmental factors to the effects of trauma. Counsellors will help you understand the root causes of your problems, your cognitive processing styles, and your interpretations of events and experiences in your life. Your counsellor may also look at your current lifestyle and your levels of stress.
The Importance of Self-Care
Good self-care such as a healthy diet and exercise can also make the world of difference to someone suffering from low self-esteem. Some ways you can practice good self-care include:
- Filling your body with healthy nutrient-rich foods. It will make your insides sing, making you look and feel better.
- Moving your body to feel the benefits of natural endorphins from exercise.
- Surrounding yourself with positive people. Trying not to isolate yourself or sit with your negative thoughts for too long.
- Simply doing things that will bring you joy and that make you feel good, eg. a new hobby.
By making these small changes and visiting a counsellor you can begin to feel a heightened sense of self and improve your beliefs about yourself. Other changes may occur such as:
- Believing you are a worthy person and also worthy of other people’s affections.
- Feeling more confident in your ability to achieve things in life that you want.
- Feeling more motivated.
- Feeling proud, satisfied and happy when you do achieve things.
You will also become better at noticing and acknowledging when low self-esteem is beginning to crop up, and learn to manage your thoughts and behaviours accordingly, using the techniques learned in counselling.
It’s never too late to seek help, and you should never think less of yourself for asking for it. Life is hard enough with all the demands and pressures we are put under on a daily basis. You do not need another critic – so if you’re really struggling to see any light at the end of the tunnel, low self-esteem counselling could really benefit you greatly.